The Ansell Family

WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Celebrating Holland - I'm Home

I have been in Holland for a while now. It has become home. I have had time to catch my breath, to settle in and adjust, and to accept this different trip than I'd planned.

I reflect back on those years when I first landed in Holland and remember clearly my shock, my fear, my anger. In those first few years, I tried to get back to Italy as planned, but Holland was where I was to stay. Today, I can say how far I have come on this unexpected journey, how much I have learned about Holland. But it has been a journey of time.

I worked hard. I bought new guidebooks. I learned a new language, and I slowly found my way around in Holland. I met others whose plans had changed like mine and who could share my experience. Some of these fellow travellers had been in Holland longer than I and were seasoned guides, assisting me along the way. Many have encouraged me and have taught me to open my eyes to the wonder and gifts to behold in this new land. We supported one another, some have become very special friends, and I have discovered a community of caring. Holland isn't so bad.

I think that Holland is used to wayward travellers like me and has become a land of hospitality, reaching out to welcome, assist, and support newcomers. Over the years, I've wondered what life would have been like if I'd landed in Italy as planned. Would life have been easier? Would it have been as rewarding? Would I have learned the important lessons I benefit from today?

Sure, this journey has been challenging and at times I would (and still do) stomp my feet and cry out in frustration and protest. And, yes, Holland is slower paced and less flashy that Italy, but this, too, has been an unexpected gift. I have learned to slow down and look closer at things, with a new appreciation for the remarkable beauty of Holland. I have discovered that it doesn't matter where you land. What's more important is what you make of your journey and how you see and enjoy the very special things that Holland has to offer. I have come to love Holland and call it home.

Yes, I landed in a place I hadn't planned. Yet I am thankful, for this destination has been richer than I could have imagined.

The Smell of Rain

A cold March wind danced around the dead of night in Dallas as the doctor walked into the small hospital room of Diana Blessing. She was still groggy from surgery.

Her husband, David, held her hand as they braced themselves for the latest news. That afternoon of March 10, 1991, complication had forced Diana, only 24-weeks pregnant, to undergo an emergency Cesarean to deliver the couple's new daugheter, Dana Lu Blessing.

At 12 inches long and weighing only one pound, nine ounces, they already knew she was perilously premature.

Still, the doctor's soft words dropped like bombs.

"I don't think she's going to make it," he said, as kindly as he could.

"There's only a 10-percent chance she will live through the night, and even then, if by some slim chance she does make it, her future could be a very cruel one"

Numb with disbelief, David and Diana listened as the doctor described the devastating problems Dana would likely face if she survived.

She would never walk, she would never talk, she would probably be blind, and she would certainly be prone to other catastrophic conditions from berebral palsy to complete mental retardation, and on and on.

"No! No!" was all Diana could say.

She and David, with their 5-year-old son Dustin had long dreamed of the day the day they would have a daughter to become a family of four.

Now, within a matter of hours, that dream was slipping away

But as those first days passed, a new agony set in for David and Diana. Because Dana's underdeveloped nervous system was essentially "raw", the lightest kiss or caress only intensified her discomfort, so they couldn't even cradle the tiny baby girl against their chests to offer the strength of their love.

All they could do, as Dana struggled alone beneath the ultraviolet light in the tangle of tubes and wires, was to pray that God would stay close to their precious little girl.

There was never a moment when Dana suddenly grew stronger.

But as the weeks went by, she did slowly gain an ounce of weight here and an ounce of strengh there.

At last, when Dana turned two months old, her parents were able to hold her in their arms for the very first time.

And two months later, though doctors continued to gently but grimly warn that her chances of surviving, much less living any kind of normal life were next to zero, Dana went home from the hospital, just as her mother had predicted.

Five years later, when Dana was a petite but feisty young girl with glittering gray eyes and unquenchable zest for life, she showed no signs whatsoever of any mental or physical impairment. Simply, she was everything a little girl can be and more. But that happy ending is far from the end of her story.

One blistering afternoon in the summer of 1996 near her home in Irving, Texas, DAna was sitting in her mother's lap in the bleachers of a local ball park where her brother Dustin's baseball team was practicing.

As always, Dana was chattering nonstop with her mother and several other adults sitting nearby, when she suddenly fell silent Hugger her arms across her chest, little Dana asked, "do you smell that?"

Smelling the air and detecting the approach of a thunderstorm, Diana replied, "yes, it smells like rain."

Dana closed her eyes and again asked, "do you smell that?"

Once again, her mother replied, "yes, I think we're about to get we. It smells like rain."

Still caught in the moment, Dana shook her head, patted her thin shoulders with her small hands and loudly announced, "No, it smells like Him. It smells like God when you lay your head on HIs chest."

Tears blurred Diana's eyes as Dana happily hopped down to play with the other children.

Before the rains came, her daugher's words confirmed what Diana and all the members of the extended Blessing family had known, at least in their hearts, all along.

During those long days and nights of her first two months of her life, when her nerves were too sensitive for them to touch her, God was holding Dana on His chest and it is His loving scent that she remebers so well.

"I can do all things in Him who strengthens me."

This is the portion of the article that Colton was in for the Butler Eagle

Butler Eagle
Article published April 21, 2007

Broken Hearts
Babies battle heart defects

Melanie Ansell of Sandy Lake, Mercer County, describes her family as "very blessed," though the health record of her 1-year-old Colton reads more like that of a 70-year-old. He has a stent in his heart, platinum coils installed in his arteries, pulmonary hypertension, and he is on continuous oxygen. He's had emphysema, open heart surgery and is homebound six months out of the year to avoid infection. Most of his problems stem from a congenital heart defect." We are very blessed and so fortunate to have him
at all," Ansell said. "Years ago Colton would not have made it." When she was six months pregnant, Ansell went to United Community Hospital , now Grove City Medical Center , in Grove City , thinking she had the flu. "They were going to run tests for a urinary tract infection, but decided I was in labor and called for a LifeFlight to Magee-Women's Hospital in Pittsburgh," she said.But it was too late. Colton was born 40 minutes later, before the helicopter arrived. Colton and his father, Brady, took the helicopter to Magee while Melanie stayed in Grove City . Colton had "bad lungs" and was only 2 pounds, 6 ounces. Things were scary but going fine, Melanie Ansell said. Then she learned that Colton had tetralogy of fallot with pulmonary atresia or TOF-PA a serious heart defect. "It was the first time in my life that I felt
like I was going to faint," she said. Like most parents, the Ansells wanted to know why. But Wearden, who also did Colton 's surgery, told them they may never know. They would have to take it up with "the big guy upstairs." Wearden explained that tetralogy of fallot has four components: a VSD, or hole in the heart; narrowing of the pulmonary valve; right ventricular hypertrophy it works harder to pump against the obstructed outflow tract; and an overriding aorta, in which the heart twists a little too far and overrides the hole. On July 10, after growing for four months in the hospital, Colton pulled through his first surgery and was released in 10 days rather than the anticipated months. Ansell counts the staff at Children's Hospital, Wearden and Dr. Victor Morell who helped to perform Colton's surgery and most heart surgeries at Children's as blessings too. "They are so dedicated. They will sit at our kids' bedsides for 24 hours to make sure our babies pull through the night. We are so fortunate to have a top-rate facility and top surgeons in Pittsburgh ." Finally home, Colton is seen once a week by a speech therapist for feeding, an occupational therapist for fine motor skills and a physical therapist for gross motor skills. All of them work in Mercer County Behavioral Health's early intervention program. On Wednesday, speech therapist Nikki Frost spoon-fed Colton Stage 3 oatmeal with apples for the first time while he played with a bowlful of baby spoons. "I'm trying to advance him from Stage 2 smooth foods to Stage 3 lumpy." Though Colton has four teeth, he gagged a little on the new texture. But not nearly as much as he did with his first solids. "He was intubated through his mouth off and on for several months, and many babies who have that are averse to food afterwards. . He would gag and throw up," Frost explained, as Colton 's mother intercepted his 3-year-old brother, Jensen, who attempted to slingshot one of the baby spoons across the room. "Jensen has been great considering all the attention his brother gets. He's very proud of his little brother and loves him very much," said Ansell. She manages to care for the two boys while
working a 40-hour week at the U.S. Investigations Services Grove City annex, counting her employer's flexibility among her blessings. "My boss, Ron Rummell, said 'You didn't go to life. It came to you and we're going to help you get through it.'" "His support has made a huge difference," she said of his willingness to accommodate her scheduling needs. Some of her fellow employees donated their vacation time so that Ansell could tend to her son's needs. She also gets support from her family and from
other local mothers of CHD babies in a group formed by Buffy Storm of Slippery Rock, whose son Tony has the same defect as Colton . "Buffy's son Tony was an honoree for Butler County American Heart Association's Heart Walk last year. Colton is this year's honoree for Mercer County ," Ansell said. Today, Colton looks healthy, weighs more than 17 pounds and is active to the point that he gets tangled in the tube for his oxygen tank. But his battle is not over. "His prognosis is very good, very treatable. There can be anywhere from two to five open hearts remaining, and he'll need constant monitoring until adulthood," Ansell said. She remains hopeful, despite the fact that though one in 125 babies is born with a CHD, funding for the disease is only one penny compared to each dollar spent for cancer research. "More funding is desperately needed for research to make strides in development for our CHD kids," Ansell said. "Who knows what the next technological advancement may be, maybe one that would aid in my child's life or the life of another.

THE BRICK

A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down

when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door! He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown. The angry driver

then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against

a parked car shouting, "What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?" The young boy was apologetic. "Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do," He pleaded. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop..." With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. "It's my brother, "he said "He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up."

Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me."

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay. "Thank you and may God bless you," the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy! push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home.

It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message: "Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!" God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.

LINKS

Please find below a list of links to other sites:

http://campbellstory.com/

Please check out the web site for Amy, Greg and Evan. They have done a beautiful job on the site and you can still link to their previous family page that follows Evan's heroic journey though his life. I hope to have a piture to add soon.

http://www.babyhomepages.net/storm/

You will enjoy the stories of Tony, Kylie, and Braydon. Tony and Kylie are twins, and Tony also has Tetrollogy of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia. Tony also has DiGeorges Syndrome, which is the chromosonal disorder than can accompany TOF/PA.

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/heartparentsofpgh/

This is a group of heart parents that all take our children to Children's Hospital, Pittsburgh, PA. It is a great support network, made up of families with all different types of heart disease. Please share this site with anyone with a heart child who would like to join. Just venting to other parents who have and are in the same place in life can be very helpful!!!!

http://www.chdinfo.com/chdaware/chdspecial.htm

This site focuses on different CHD's and "our day" Feb. 14th. Many of you will find that this site is pretty easy to follow.

http://www.chp.edu/

Here is the home site for Children's Hospital Pittsburgh. You can read up on the Cardiology Department or send Colton and e-card during his stay.

http://www.cincinnatichildrens.org/health/heart-encyclopedia/anomalies/tof.htm

This is a run down on the basics of Colton's innitial disease. Tet. of Fallot with Pulmonary Atresia.

http://www.babyheartspress.com/poster2.html

Another heart mom wrote this poem. She has several things out there and they are very amazingly true.